Why

And I get about 30 pages in and hand it to a staff for proofing, because it's my first one

Well, he thinks I have other intentions with my writing

Reports and threatens cops on me

was it a book about a school shooting?

or more some existential teenage angst stuff like Catcher in the Rye without the gay undertone

Let's pretend that it alluded to that

Though, I didn't intend on doing anything

It was just a book

And I was trying to make a point

well then you did nothing wrong

so you wrote a pewpew shoot up the school fantasy, freaked out some blue haired school marm, your parents flipped, and the cops were in a tizzy for a bit.

Cops weren't involved

let's not assume fantasy

Though, the panic button was ready to be pushed

so the principal called your parents and that was about it?

Thankfully

and your parents were pissed

so they sent you to a shrink i presume?

More relived that I didn't get a criminal record

And no

yeah dont feel bad about that you didn't do anything wrong if that's the whole story

it sounds like you're making a mountain out of a molehill

much ado about nothing

all those cliches

Then I guess I'm a greater fool than I thought I was

Sorry for wasting characters

The school thought you were the weird goth kid for the rest of the duration, no big deal

it wasnt a crime for Orwell to wright 1984, and it seems you did the same thing on a different topic

i was my school's *only* goth girl in the era of the columbine shooting, i know that reaction

naw ace waking up from the brainwashing that we all went through is the 1st step to having a meaningful life

right after it happened the school called my parents and actually told me to stay home

Water under the bridge now. And now, I know better, to a certain degree

lol so we had this Korean kid in my school and he was weird. not in a culture way, just weird. I was friends with him and everyone wanted me to keep him happy cuz the whole school thought he was gonna shoot it up one day

it was a very strange situation

everyone wanted to know about his mood

and nothing was the right answer

all i am hearing is that you feel foolish and have been kicking yourself into a hole over nothing, and convinced yourself to acquire a massive non-customary debt (kids don't usually repay private k-12 education) as a means to make yourself feel better, not actually atone for anything. there isn't anything to atone for

happy. is he happy cuz hes gonna kill us all?
angry: is he pissed at us enough to kill us? that kind of thing

and since false atonement doesn't fill the hole of feeling foolish, you'll never feel better over it

turth