like people who use knives to open boxes are dumb

just use a key

also, my older sister went to a school in Oslo a few years ago

>canada man can't understand self-defense

neds in glasgow stab you in the ass cheek with a screwdriver out of a pound shop just to steal your phone

on the bus two assholes took her phone, she ran after them, forced one to the ground and the other just threw away the phone with a scared look on his face

someone I know got clotheslined by a ned on a bicycle

so she missed the bus iirc

tf is a ned

and then got his shit stolen

im so out of my element

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/1/1b/Glasgow_youths_4_06.jpg

clotheslined sounds very painful

oh so a chav

waaa yu fukking bellend

or goofy as we call them here

OI HERD U WERE RUNNIN YER FUUUCKKKIIIINNNNNN MOOOUUUUUTHHHHH BUDDY U TRYNA HAVE A GO ILL GET MY COUSINS TO RIP YER PORCH RIGHT OFFFFFF BUDHOW

tfw the amount of people I know who have been stabbed or mugged

and I've never been touched

feels borrowed time

>fax rings up
>paper comes out
>YOU'RE NEXT

more like

>UR NXT M8

a guy tried to politely mug me once in another city but I just ran off

went on fb to hunt you guys down a goofy post

>emos still exist

>oy m8
>could you perchance give me your phone and wallet
>please

I got to talking with him outside a pub, the pub exited out into an alley

and had a new camera with me taking pictures because we planned to book it out for a gig

right fookin real buddddyyyyyyy

and the guy came up talking nicely

then put his hand out like "gies yer camera m8."

and I was like "wot"

"gives yer camera or I'll batter fuck out of you"

said no and he told me to hold on while he goes and gets his mates

just ran the opposite way

wait

guy was shit at it

STAY THERE WHILE I GET MY BIG MATES