Message from @Officer Schweizer

Discord ID: 571841103435923486


2019-04-11 17:49:51 UTC  

Theoretically, you and your romantic partner, who is most likely of the female gender, are accompanying each other, when the cellular telephone, of which you are the legal owner, abruptly emits an audible tone, which is highly likely to be your default sound that will play when someone from another location, usually within your country of residence, depending on your telephone carrier or provider, inputs a finite pattern composed of numerical units into their legally owned cellular telephone, which in turn will send a wave that goes through a complex process that includes radios and telephone towers. You walk over to the area that the cellular telephone is physically placed, and you translate the telephone receiver from it's resting area, where it is mechanically constructed to fit into, all the way in the direction towards your ear drums, and then place the northern part of the device to your ear, and then place the southern part near your mouth, most likely onto your cheek. A voice that resembles that of an adult male proclaims "What activity are you currently in the process of completing, that involves having my female offspring attend!?". You immediately notify your female romantic companion, and she educates you on the objective fact that the paternal guardian that she normally refers to as "Father" has stopped living some time in the past, and is also currently deceased. If the details of this story are in fact, the truth, than it is now your duty to answer the question of 'Who was calling you and your romantic companion on your cellular telephone?'.

2019-04-12 01:17:42 UTC  

I absolutely love you guys.

Thanks for everything, thanks for the chaos, thanks for the enlightenment, the meme wars, and the truth seeking. Thanks for the "conspiracy theories" which have been an enormous asset in opening the minds of such people as have a natural tendency towards controversy.

We need the controversy. It is not that common sense is always wrong, it is that common sense is sometimes and often wrong. We need people who are willing to take the damage to their popular image and ego in order to discuss ideas that are contrary.

Chaos is my life's work. It is my ultimate goal to stir chaos from within my own social network, in order to therefore stir change and stimulate creativity and growth. Stagnation is when you no longer feel comfortable exploring what is uncomfortable-- it is that meta-state of imprisonment, where you finally come to the unconscious understanding that imprisonment is the ultimate feeling of "security". Security does not exist until you are caged.

Thank you for your disruption! No doubt most of you have been told all your life about the necessity of order, sitting still, listening, and staying out of site. While these things have their place, for some of us it is not in our nature to do so. I think many of us are attracted to this board because of the freedom it allows us, to question everything, to imagine the best and the worst, to be as loud and disruptive as possible. If such a thing gives you JOY, then continue to do so! You are not bad for seeking this kind of pleasure and have never been bad. Follow what gives you this joy and laughter, even though it goes against what you are told should give you joy.

I love you all so much.

2019-04-16 20:47:48 UTC  

<:zoomer:548787209235464193>

2019-04-17 15:37:01 UTC  

Thanos dies to Thor before the opening credits, but he has already destroyed the stones. The rest of the movie centers around using the Quantum Universe to retrieve the stones from the past timeline.
Natasha and Clint go to retrieve the soul stone, with Clint sacrificing Natasha to access it.
Stark builds a gauntlet to wield the retrieved infinity stones to reverse the snap.
Banner has become Hulk permanently, but retains his intelligence and memories as Professor Hulk.
Scott, Hulk, Steve, and Tony travel to the battle of New York to retrieve the mind, space, and time stone. Steve fights his past self.
Thor is living with Korg and Miek, getting drunk and not caring about what happened. Hulk and Rocket go to get him, and his beard and hair are messy and grown out.
Hulk tried to wield the Stark gauntlet, but it appears to be too powerful for him.
Steve dual wields his shield and Mjolnir, it’s unclear how mjolnir comes back. Thor still has Stormbreaker, possible meaning he’s become unworthy due to him neglecting his duties.
Sam is the first dusted avenger to come back, we hear him say to Steve “On Your Left,” then we see T’challa and Shuri coming out of a portal, and Sam flying out.
Big scene with all the Avengers, including Wasp, the Guardians, Spider-Man, vs Thanos and a revived Black Order. It looks like the big fight in Ready Player One, but we actually care about the characters
Stark reunites with Peter and gives him a hug
Carol gets the short hair she has in recent comics, and Peter Parker gives her the Stark Gauntlet

2019-04-17 19:05:43 UTC  

<:honk:549122319654584320> how San looks realizing he's only 16 and his brain has been permanently damaged into only being attracted to shittily drawn female characters

2019-04-17 21:17:09 UTC  

<:honk:549122319654584320>

2019-04-17 21:23:46 UTC  

@satanklaus good one

2019-04-17 22:24:41 UTC  

Viktor more like Nigtor

2019-04-17 23:48:37 UTC  

Viktor more like Nigtor

2019-04-19 06:16:04 UTC  

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2019-04-20 01:50:36 UTC  

There’s like five billion different anime’s and every single one is some high school shit because they know the only ppl who would ever watch it is dumb ass high schoolers. None of the characters ever act like real ppl either and they’re all shitty tropes based off of shitty tropes dumb ass two dimensional characters and y’all just eat it all up. Who did this to u

The art is boring and ugly. I’m saying it. All the faces and characters look exactly the same AND YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE MAN it’s supposed to be set in Japan n shit right?? But all the characters are WHITE. They’re blonde n blue eyed n shit with big round ass eyes that are like two feet apart. Stupid ass dot-nose. Dumb ass pencil neck ass drawings of ugly ass ppl. That does not look like a person looks like some horror shit. abomination ass waifu.

Anyways they all look the damn same bc the people making the shit have fuckin no creativity in their barren landscapes of brains and the only variables in a girl is hair color, hair style, n boob size. That’s all. How can you claim any anime bitch as you waifu when they 👏 all 👏 is 👏 SAME👏.

My friend recommended me this one I watched like a season of it before I realized it wasn’t going to go anywhere interesting lol and the fucking intro

THE INTRO OF THE ANINE

HAD A PANTY SHOT

OF A CANON 15 YEAR OL GIRL

how can you defend that shit

“””””””oh ye it’s a different culture so saying is bad makes u racist”””””” yeah okay karyn just imply that pedophillia is acceptable in japan or literally anywhere on this godforsaken planet. you just pulling shit out ur ass n you know it.

I dare y’all to guess what anime intro it is bc that shit is so fucking rampant

Anime is the end of culture. Y’all are trash. ✌️

2019-04-21 13:53:27 UTC  

Hello everyone. As of today I will be leaving this discord server as I have been having a bit of drama with the owner of the server. I do not think that me being in this server would be a good idea, as I do not want to increase drama with said person. I have had a great time being here, and I have had a lot of fun. The said owner, since I have mentioned some things to them that offended them, does not find me as kind-hearted as I used to be, and by being here, saying anything more may put me at risk for information to be leaked. If you want to talk to me any further, send me a friend request and tell me you're from the server. I am tired of feeling bad about myself from this drama, and I'm ending it now. And everyone in the server, I love you all. [Most] of you have been very nice and helpful to me, but I still love you all. Goodbye

2019-04-21 16:36:40 UTC  

I want to sex the minecraft steve. have you seen the way his blocks are so perfectly aligned? ugh it makes me so horny. everytime i see him i imagine all the things he could do to me with those block hands of his... i don’t think i’ve ever loved a person more. everytime i think of him i instantly get moist, and i crave his touch whenever an image of him pops into my mind. his sexy, brown locks, his jeans, his tan skin, everything about him is perfect. i’ve never wanted a person so badly. no one has ever made me feel this way, and i don’t want anything more than to suck on his little block penis and taste his gamer juice. ugh. i bet he’s so big, i could feel him all the way in my stomach. he could break me. i want to sit on his square head and feel his tongue deep inside of me. i love minecraft steve

2019-04-23 00:53:17 UTC  

I'm so fucking horny for art hoes. I want to fuck a coked-out tumblr hipster DIY aesthetic astrology thot in her lip gloss DSL mouth. I want to cum all over a girl with thick frame glasses and edge dyed bobcat bangs. Everytime I hear a THICK, waist-high-jean-clad braindead choker-wearing slutty wiccan minx say "yikes", "y'all", "big mood", "cancelled" or "this is a bop", I get an uncontrollable urge to run up to her and fondle her d cups and sweaty fat thighs. I want to pour my white olive oil onto her contoured cheeks and neotenous faces and rhinoplatisized nose. I want to finger an art hoe through her jean overalls while pretending to be interested as she talks about van gogh and arctic monkeys and how david foster wallace fans suck and gilles deleuze and VICE news and 'union pool' in williamsburg and steven universe and homeopathy and saveur magazine and taking adderallto pass exams. IM SO. Fucking. Horny

2019-04-23 01:15:00 UTC  

<:kong:280497942031499266>

2019-04-23 01:16:53 UTC  

~~shamelessly stolen from a friend~~

2019-04-23 04:56:54 UTC  

Kirk is a Kike

2019-04-25 08:58:41 UTC  

I would never suggest removing a little girl's clothes and licking her tiny body all over, nibbling her neck and kissing her adorable little nipples. Only a heartless monster would think about her cute girlish mouth and tongue wrapped around a thick cock slick with her saliva, pumping in and out of her mouth until it erupts, the cum more than her little throat can swallow. The idea of thick viscous semen overflowing, dribbling down her chin over her flat chest, her tiny hands scooping it all up and watching her suck it off her fingertips is just horrible. You're all a bunch of sick perverts, thinking of spreading her smooth slender thighs, cock poised at the entrance to her pure, tight, virginal pussy, and thrusting in deep as a whimper escapes her lips which are slippery with cum, while her small body shudders from having her cherry taken in one quick stroke. I am disgusted at how you'd get even more excited as you lean over her, listening to her quickening breath, her girlish moans and gasps while you hasten your strokes, her sweet pants warm and moist on your face and her flat chest, shiny with a sheen of fresh sweat, rising and falling rapidly to meet yours. It is truly nasty how you'd run your hands all over her tiny body while you violate her, feeling her nipples hardening against your tongue as you lick her chest, her neck and her armpits, savoring the scent of her skin and sweat while she trembles from the stimulation and as she reaches her climax, hearing her cry out softly as she has her first orgasm while that cock is buried impossibly deep inside her, pulsing violently as an intense amount of hot cum spurts forth and floods through her freshly-deflowered pussy for the first time, filling her womb only to spill out of her with a sickening squelch. And as you lie atop her flushed body, she murmurs breathlessly, then her fingers dig into your back as she feels your cock hardening inside again.

2019-04-25 14:10:18 UTC  

<:chrishansen:543963078753124352>

2019-04-26 02:07:50 UTC  

Niggers (scientific name: Simia africanus, the Black Monkey) are an extremely violent and cerebrally underdeveloped species of Apes devolved from gorillas and orangutans (not bonobos/chimpanzees, higher life forms). They are the "Missing Link" in Evolutionary Biology as the more retarded simian cousins to the Neanderthal ancestors of our higher species Homo Sapiens. Niggers, in contrast to Neanderthals, were unable to develop the IQ required for civilization due to lack of evolutionary incentives from their native environment; in fact, premature exposure to Human Civilization overloads their cerebral cortexes resulting in instinctive violence, this is known as a chimp out or a "Nigger Moment". This is why a specimen of Great Apes, when subjected to the stress demanded by a Human-dominated environment, degenerates into the highly dangerous form that it has today known as the Nigger (example: what happened to Harambe). Niggers are poor, retarded, so ugly that even animal lovers don't want to fuck them, and worse, they smell like a mixture of wild animal fur and a decayed old mop full of shit even after taking a shower. Having spent the last million years in the African jungle throwing spears at each other and swinging on vines, niggers are predisposed to crime and antisocial behavior due to their biology and (de)evolution. Their introduction into peaceful white society has led to them becoming an invasive species.

2019-04-27 23:32:23 UTC  

The Tiananmen Square protests of 1989, commonly known in mainland China as the June Fourth Incident (六四事件), were student-led demonstrations in Beijing, the capital of the People's Republic of China, in 1989. More broadly, it refers to the popular national movement inspired by the Beijing protests during that period, sometimes called the '89 Democracy Movement (八九民运). The protests were forcibly suppressed after the government declared martial law. In what became known in the West as the Tiananmen Square Massacre, troops with automatic rifles and tanks killed at least several hundred demonstrators trying to block the military's advance towards Tiananmen Square. The number of civilian deaths has been estimated variously from 180 to 10,454.

2019-04-30 17:53:11 UTC  

Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air
In west Philadelphia born and raised
On the playground was where I spent most of my days
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
And all shootin some b-ball outside of the school
When a couple of guys who were up to no good
Started making trouble in my neighborhood
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
She said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air'
I begged and pleaded with her day after day
But she packed my suit case and sent me on my way
She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket.
I put my Walkman on and said, 'I might as well kick it'.
First class, yo this is bad
Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass.
Is this what the people of Bel-Air living like?
Hmm this might be alright.
But wait I hear they're prissy, bourgeois, all that
Is this the type of place that they just send this cool cat?
I don't think so
I'll see when I get there
I hope they're prepared for the prince of Bel-Air
Well, the plane landed and when I came out
There was a dude who looked like a cop standing there with my name out
I ain't trying to get arrested yet
I just got here
I sprang with the quickness like lightning, disappeared
I whistled for a cab and when it came near
The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror
If anything I could say that this cab was rare
But I thought 'Nah, forget it' - 'Yo, homes to Bel Air'
I pulled up to the house about seven or eigth
And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo homes smell ya later'
I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air

2019-04-30 21:24:36 UTC  

Apply Shrinkwrap
Pick Up Box
Put Down Box
Remove Shrinkwrap

2019-05-03 05:42:44 UTC  

Noobmaster, hey it’s Thor again. You know, the god of thunder? Listen buddy, if you don’t log off this game immediately I will fly over to your house, and come down to that basement you’re hiding in and rip off your arms and shove them up your butt! Oh, that’s right, yea just go cry to your father you little weasel.

2019-05-06 16:54:44 UTC  

动态网自由门 天安門 天安门 法輪功 李洪志 Free Tibet 六四天安門事件 The Tiananmen Square protests of 1989 天安門大屠殺 The Tiananmen Square Massacre 反右派鬥爭 The Anti-Rightist Struggle 大躍進政策 The Great Leap Forward 文化大革命 The Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution 人權 Human Rights 民運 Democratization 自由 Freedom 獨立 Independence 多黨制 Multi-party system 台灣 臺灣 Taiwan Formosa 中華民國 Republic of China 西藏 土伯特 唐古特 Tibet 達賴喇嘛 Dalai Lama 法輪功 Falun Dafa 新疆維吾爾自治區 The Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region 諾貝爾和平獎 Nobel Peace Prize 劉暁波 Liu Xiaobo 民主 言論 思想 反共 反革命 抗議 運動 騷亂 暴亂 騷擾 擾亂 抗暴 平反 維權 示威游行 李洪志 法輪大法 大法弟子 強制斷種 強制堕胎 民族淨化 人體實驗 肅清 胡耀邦 趙紫陽 魏京生 王丹 還政於民 和平演變 激流中國 北京之春 大紀元時報 九評論共産黨 獨裁 專制 壓制 統一 監視 鎮壓 迫害 侵略 掠奪 破壞 拷問 屠殺 活摘器官 誘拐 買賣人口 遊進 走私 毒品 賣淫 春畫 賭博 六合彩 天安門 天安门 法輪功 李洪志 Winnie the Pooh 劉曉波动态网自由门

2019-05-07 00:38:19 UTC  

Lmao you're a funny one. Not sure if I should ban you or keep you here for the amusement.

There's a certain hierarchy here as my admin badge should have keyed you in on, and you went and mocked me. Do you know how much power I have? I'm not just the admin of a group with over 50k members, I've got a network of admins that are loyal to me alone and their power spans over all of left book. I'm a veritable champion online, and if you don't do what I say... Why don't you message some group members and find out;)

The only reason you're not banned yet is that is that I wanted to give you some time to read this first... To know how deep the shit you're in is.

Don't mock my community, don't mock Harry Potter fans or those winning with autism. You want another chance?
Say you understand and apologise, and say you've been a stupid fuck in a beautiful place.

2019-05-07 00:39:16 UTC  

lol

2019-05-07 00:51:54 UTC  

Yeah I’m not surprised your girl wants to leave you for me. Not my fault I’m fucking epic gamer style. Why wouldn’t she wanna be with me lol I have a 3.2 kd in Fortnite, backseat game in Twitch chats, and I reddit hard as fuck. Sorry for being too dope...

2019-05-07 01:01:04 UTC  

>Due to Trudeau's nationalization of their grocery stores, Canadians have resorted to only eating cheap foods (Kraft Dinner). The insanely inflated prices of our grocery products were the direct result of Trudeau's bold new strategy to combat rising prices in his nations markets.

>But also due to the liberals cutting back on natural gas production, nobody but the rich uses stoves now. Canadians are resorting to making their Kraft Dinner in their kitchen sink. A trend dubbed "Tub mac", which started in 2017.

>Canadian health advisory has recommended that this is not a healthy or sanitary way to cook a meal, and has urged Canadians to not participate in this new trend.

Pots are fucking expensive in Canada. Each family has 1 maybe 2 good pots big enough to cook for a family. You burn them and its tub mac from there on out.

A typical meal in most places in Canada is either deer meat or tub mac. Sometimes moose if you live close to a first nations reserve because if your white you cant legally own a licence to hunt moose.

If a Canadian family is lucky some bug protein will find its way into the tub mac from the sink drain (left unplugged for this reason) as you serve the food. This is the origin of the saying "I got the lucky bug!" in Canada.

2019-05-07 01:01:09 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/542427382955638794/575124934263832586/1557190622233.png

2019-05-08 02:24:19 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/542427382955638794/575508252578676777/1557280478770.png

2019-05-09 11:23:11 UTC  

Mama Mia

2019-05-13 07:52:58 UTC  

okay, so I’ve come to this kind of insane conclusion and I don’t know how to react. I’m terrified and I’m unsure what I’m supposed to do. I have come to the conclusion that homosexuals are like *really gay* like oh my god. I thought homosexual meant like you like having sex in your own home and like I’m so scared like what is even going on?!?1 😳😳😳

2019-05-13 17:39:22 UTC  

Every day I wake up and I thank the Lord God that I was not born a nigger. I pray to him for blessing me with this white skin that has allowed me to live a free and peaceful life. I thank God for not making me a nigger so that I do not have to deal with such horrible misfortunes that niggers face everyday - the fact that they have no money or shelter, have no fathers to raise them, have crack addict mothers who give birth to 7 niggers each, don't go to school because they keep fighting the white students, have to steal a white man's bike just so they can run from the honorable and dutiful police when they rob the local McDonalds, have to sell weed and collect welfare to earn money, constantly shoot other niggers because of conflicts between gangs that exist for no reason other than for niggers to give themselves a reason to stay alive, and usually end up in prison by age 16. If God had made me a nigger, I would not have been able to grow up in a loving and supporting family and gain respect from my community that will allow me to fulfill my dreams in life. In fact, niggers cannot have dreams, because even if they did, they would be aware that they could never fulfill it due to their subhuman lifestyle.

2019-05-15 12:56:49 UTC  

<:boomer:548791879018217482>

2019-05-22 08:49:28 UTC  

SERVICE ERROR 305:MESSAGE DELIVERY FAILED. FURTHER MESSAGES WILL BE CHARGED TO YOUR ACCOUNT

2019-05-22 08:49:47 UTC  

Whomst’d’ve’ly’yaint’nt’ed’ies’s’y’es

2019-05-22 08:50:20 UTC  

ᴴⁱᵗ ᵒʳ ᵐⁱˢˢ, ᴵ ᵍᵘᵉˢˢ ᵗʰᵉʸ ⁿᵉᵛᵉʳ ᵐⁱˢˢ ʰᵘʰ?

2019-05-22 13:49:14 UTC  

>extreme contraction memes in 2019

2019-05-22 13:49:17 UTC  

Just die dude

2019-05-22 15:35:33 UTC  

I have all that shit on text replacement lol