I'm sure you'll find readers

nah Idrc, I made the book for pure jokes and fun

the only thing more dangerous than a assault rifle is a woman driving

Nah. Its my husband backing up in a parking lot

lol

🤦🏻‍♀️ that isnt a joke. He needs a spotter

LOL

that sounds like my mother

almost

she's not that bad

but still

Me, I can back a trailer in at 20mph with just my mirrors

sounds like my dad

But I was made to practice. And practice. And practice

he pulled off keeping the huge ass expedition from sliding down the ice, on a steep hill

going like 5mph

Thats impressive

yes it was

When it snows here I start raging

my Mom on the other hand was too scared to stay in the car, she walked all the way down and went far out of the way.

snow is cool and all, but such a hassle to deal with

Because people think they can still go 115 on i45

Instead of slowing down and going the same speed as the truckers

Which.. really seems common sense to me?

In hawaii you won't be going faster than 65.... 😦 I can no longer say "WE HIT 88, WE'RE GOING BACK TO THE FUTURE DOC!"

Ah yeah. Well we have roads with speed limits up to 85

And they are just suggestion

In texas there was a 95 MPH road we were on

but some peopel had the nerve to go 110

That wouldn't surprise me

like wtf

typical

Of course

nothing compared to Dubai

Dubai road rage is far worse than Dallas

I had a broken speedometer once and had no clue how fast I was going

but off the road everything is all peaceful

it's weird

It said I was going 10 when im sure I was going well over 100

In Dubai, on the freeways/highways, you'd go like 120mph

generally

Nice

Women drivers no survivors

^

<:KEK:795742276549607456>

Idk. Ive been driving for more than 20 years. I trust my driving over most

Not legally of course 😂

I've only had my license for.. 17 of those years lol

I think that's right.

I can drive ok but not 4 wheelers

I always end up with various broken bones

<:CursedEmoji:763140778770825247>

I havent been on a 4 wheeler since I was like 14

Like the arm i currently have in a sling <:CursedEmoji:763140778770825247>

A friend of my brother's died flipping one

4 wheeler?

what

Yeah. He was 11 at the time

I mean. He always will be?

like a 4 wheel car?

No you fucking city slicker

A 4 wheeler

No. Like a dirt bike with 4 wheels

But not narrow

Ur not allowed on farmers only

like this?

what in the actual

No. We do have one of those in our yard though

The truck version

can i ride it

I think the kids took the wheels off

what heathens

They are MY kids. I cant imagine what anyone would expect other than heathens

LOL

so u do agree with me

How do u not know what a 4 wheeler is

Are u pulling my mf leg

Yeah. I mean, they are heathens

like a truck?

No it's a 4 wheeler

Idk what else to call it

like an atv?

Yes

oh ok

why didnt u say so

sheesh confusing me

Aka bone breaker 2000s

Because the standard name here is 4 wheeler

And occasionally kid killer

we call it an a tv

all terrain vehicle

ATVs are fun af

@Mcgoober u shouldve say atv

lul

No

It's a 4 wheeler

Same thing

ATV

and they're fun af

we need a voice of reason

nah

@SkinnyMofo they still sell kids meals at bk?

naw

they still do that at BK?

u just ask them

for one

BK is gross

all fast food is gross

they give it away free

either

good for the movement

Bk is one of the few places I can eat because they dont add things like flour to their seasoning

but

their bread

mom buy me fast food

Or milk to their fries 🤦🏻‍♀️ thanks mcdonalds

😛

is flour

I cant eat the bread

are u siliac?

i havnet had bk is oof

But I have have a whopper without the bread

3 yearS?

Nope. Allergic to wheat milk and eggs

Its a joy.

ouch

Finding fast food that won't kill me has been fun

I can't live without my bread and carbs

they have good crowns tho

thats why i got one

That's okay, Fast Food sucks anyways

in a years time

tried to yawn

the bk crown will be added to the adl

IT HURT LIKE HELL

mah jaw

Besides, a whopper without the bread is just like a beef salad

Its fine. I do miss the bread though lol

@dimidarn u have celiac?

No. Gluten is fine. As long as it isn't from wheat

I however did have my scalp blister the last time I used a keratin shampoo, because they use wheat for that

So that was fun

my friend gets bloated everytime she eats gluten

Uhm...

but wheat

is gluten

No. Theres glutinous rice

I would poke fun at her by asking when the baby shower

And there's gluten in barley

And gluten in rye

what kind of rice has gluten?

I know rye and barely had gluten but like

rice by nature isnt glutenious

Glutinous rice 😂

glutinous rice?

c'mon

sushi rice

gotta be a joke

Its literally sold as either lol

sushi rice is glutenious

which one Calrose?

or the other sushi rice

usually any

They are glutinous rice..es?

they need to stick went

well

I just eat Jasmine Rice it's better

there are

I have like.. 8 kinds of rice rn

nice

uh oh we're talking about food again

that didn't end so well last time

yes Hairry Legs

I really need to eat the red and black rice before they go rancid

It ended hiliariously last time

Yes

Yes it did

They have oils in them that white rice doesn't have

<:KEK:795742276549607456>

ye I'd do that

Do not drink root beer with a double bacon cheeseburger

why

Why not

It does not settle well

@dimidarn I'm dumb

Tf you talkin bout?

Hmm?

I missed risotto rice

I had a double bacon cheeseburger at BJ's restuarant with their HOMEMADE Root Beer

and I had 3 of those glasses

yumyum

felt good

Arborrio?

yeah

that's glutenious

I prolly spelled it wrong

Yeah it is. Ita also really nice

I think I have like 4lbs of that

arborio

I dunno but this root beer did not go with the burger

And 25 of calrose

also boiled rice has gluten

Calrose is good

but they dont tell u that

Root Beer is my favorite soda

kek

yes

And like 200lbs of long grain white and another 50 of jasmine. May have too much rice

anyways night

Root Beer > Pepsi Wild Cherry > Dr Pepper > eVERYTHing else

Thats not even getting into the weird stuff

Jasmine rice is amazing

but yeah tht's alot of rice

You know what I'd do?

Make a ton of rice up

I don't anything aside from brown and white rice

and feed the homeless

i'm not very cultured

I'm worried about food shortages.

I have kids to feed

Are there food shortages?

Not yet.

With 200lbs of rice?

I mean okay

No, thats why I'm not especially worried

But the food i have will last about 2 months with me rationing and everyone else eating their regular calories. Which won't do much if systems shut down

We actually just ran out of our 25lb bag of rice, which is weird, cause we eat alot of rice

rice is boring

gotta get more from COSTCO

YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH FOOL

If its just me, I eat 5lbs of rice a week

hey fam-squad. i have a question. is there such thing as "over-positivity"?

When everyone else is eating it... its 4x that much

I eat hydrochloric acid mixed with a side of uranium get on my level pleb

sounds like me. People say you can get constipated from eating too much rice, but my dinner consists of 1.5 Cups of Rice...

and I've never had that prolbem

damn

that sounds

S P I C Y

<:KEK:795742276549607456>

Yes

Yeah its never bothered me

its impossible for me to get sick of rice

I dont really have many other options

And potatoes did get boring

Potatoes are goooood

I like em air fryed and salted